media effects

These days Media effects is my fav subject. and studying it has helped me in atleast one thing. It let me identify things in me that gives the reigns of my life back to me. I have, to an extent, successfully de-sanitized myself. A certain kind of person, me and a certain others, tend to be swayed more with the underlying assumptions of the mediated message. and in a certain way. I tend to see reflections of myself in others, mostly. So when I see this person - who cringes at someone else's slightest touch. who backsup with revulsion at things 'mass'. who increasingly prefers abstracted content, cause emotions laid bare irritate like scratching sound on glass. who is running on the treadmill of choices and can't stop. who is so afraid of oneself's vulnerability that won't let it out for even a moment and goes out of way to hide 'em. who can't decide about oneself's emotions since the invisible other that media constructs has to be consulted but remains mum at primal moments. who constructs unnecessary distances between relations, emotions and within. - i wish for them to be set free.
fucked up life. I atleast know that its a fucked up life. There's much hubris in that statement, but i am learning to not care of my hubris.


[This thought had come in the form of two succint lines to me. and now when i put them to paper, the thought is hardly communicable and so many unnecesary words fill the space up. shit.]