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The moustache

Moustaches.
They are an endangered species. Not many nations and men wear them anymore. Ok, so Stalin and Hitler wore one, but that doesn't mean all moustaches are evil. They aren't the voodoos of gods of mayhem. They do not have a mind of their own. They are quite harmless really. well, most of the time. (tip1 - mind your kisses and curries for a healthy relationship with your moustache)

Don't listen to what your mom tells you. For them moustache is a sign of you growing out of their nests. That's perhaps unsettling for them, it should not be for you. Do not listen to your love interest as well. Unless she has some rare hair-phobia, hair should never really be important enough topics of interest between two people in love. (which in reverse, essentially means, you shouldn't really be bothering her about her decision to wax or not to wax  her feet.)

Imagine a couple on the arrange-a-marriage date.
q1. Do you smoke?
q2. Do you drink?
q3. Do you plan to keep that moustache of yours? :)
Kthxbye

Which brings me to the question of the importance of a moustache. Is it? Its absolutely not important. or it might be. you decide. its really just some well mannered hair. You let it grow. it takes some shape. you like it. you keep it. you perhaps trim it. or remove it. big deal. give it a break. it grows out nevertheless. Do not burden the humble facial hair with the medals of manliness, the proof of your deviance, the nonchalance of your coolness. A man is no different when with a moustache or when without.

imagine a guy being remembered just as 'that guy with funny moustache'. hmm.. that's all. that's all he's  got? that's all there is to him? 

Full moons do not affect them, neither do they get special discounts at big bazaar. The Indian railway has no reserve quota for them (yet), neither are their people out on streets demanding reservation for mustachioed men{i hope. fingers crossed). There has been no survey, but i am pretty sure that non mustachioed people are represented adequately in the armed forces, hence there is really no reason for it to symbolise some kind of war-time awesomeness.

Which brings me to the question, are moustaches awesome? well, like cars, clothes, homes.... sure, why not. :)


(i can still be vain - moustache or no moustache. :) ) 
moustache will go, so will the cars... 
money will flow, beers too in bars...
but vanity will stay on, forever. like vetaal on your self image of vikram. 

so go ahead and give that friendly slap to the friendly Gillette salesman who's preaching all sorts of nonsense about 'facial hair = lazy', and asking women to bother us through their shitty 'shave India' campaign. and go ahead grow a moustache. or not. 

Comments

R-Kay said…
And sometimes the moustache plays a great side kick to the beard! Lets take this a new level altogether!
R-Kay said…
To a new level*
Ajinkya Pawar said…
Totally. what's a handlebar without a headlamp :P 
Aparna m said…
While I was snickering - I suddenly stumbled to your last closing line. My deal with Gillette and what it actually implies and stands for - and which I have been debating since some time - got aggravated renewed.
If women like the sensitive, smooth shaved face of men - which is what makes it so kissable - from that same logic - what about the rest of the man's body!!!!!! (u get the drift right??)Am just saying - what is with this hypocritical stance regarding a woman's preference to kiss a smooth shaved face and their having no choice with the rest of the man's body?Or let me put it this way - why does society (and certain cultures/offices etc etc) prefer their men to be clean shaven from the face and not anywhere else?Or let me put it another way - why do men watch Gilette ads - and get motivated to buy MACH 3 or whatever - and do nothing about the rest of the body

otherwise. I find your article quite entertaining - esply your vikram and vetaal analogy.
oh and moustaches should stay.
They - now how would you put it -

add character. :)
Ajinkya Pawar said…
 :) they do. ek fataa pant, mildly torn shoe. a scar somewhere and a moustache. now that's nice :P

Also, yes i agree... everybody, men, women, zygotes should be chikne chamelis with no hair what so ever on the body anywhere.. ANYWHERE. when they fall on the floor they should slide endlessly. Then finally we can have indian teams winning in Luge.  and how wonderful would commutes be, if we could just slide across to offices from home.
P said…
I've always thought clean shaven men look like baby potatoes.
Facial hair ftw.
Ajinkya Pawar said…
:) i agree. i want to like this comment. where the hell's the button. oh. there is. i like. :)

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Ctrl-tab
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Alt-tab
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Catch yourself slipping away.

Deep  breath. 

Close the browser. silence the mobile and turn it away.

Open an offline-real-paper diary. Stop your thighs from lolling impatiently. Stay still. 

Pick up a pen awkwardly. ahh, the fingers are stiff. It will take a  while for them to get used to holding a pen. Quick finger exercise - open the palm, stretch finger outwards, close into a fist, dig the fingers in. Repeat.
Ok now.. about to pick up the pen again, but eyes dart towards the screen. Tempted to check email.

Shut up. The last consequential email came two months ago. Nothing of consequence is online.

Pick up the pen. Don't fetishize the object now. Get on with it. Put it on paper, write a word and start it already. If I get to a sentence, perhaps I will get into a flow and won't have to look up from the paper at all. 

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