sunday

after a long long time, i spent a whole day at home. fragmented thoughts... letting them be. to do list, letting it be. well, truth be told, the day was spent in hope and plan of spending it elsewhere too.. but that hope and plan existed in that uncertain plain which you know is only an illusion, a dim possibility, and that uncertainty is what gives our existence that vibrating energy. u keep on attempting to change course of time, but someone else has already shaped it in concrete for you.

time. time is like water, i said.. it ever flows. some one said 'bull shit' to this. then i said.. 'time is bullshit, ever present and infinite'. :P and then we missed ek chaalis ki last local. that was yesterday's time. today's time was moody and stuck to my skin a tad too intimately. it stretched with my yawns, it lingered on my open eyes staring with me the ceiling and the spider web in corner. and when i wished my time to be somewhere else, it simply deserted me... i was left staring at the glittering rectangle for hours. and when i was aware of myself again, time slowed down and let me be me. it let me feel my muscles slowly tensing before i move. it let me feel my breath and where it goes and what my nose thinks of it. it let me hold the guitar in admiration and see if it breathes too.

and tomorrow, it will put on its weekday hat with whip in hand. until then, lets just be.