Digging for Meaning

We live in a fog.  The daily Sisyphean chore is to  try and clear that fog. If you can watch your breath, that is enough. 

Just read this - ‘I want to help humans genetically modify themselves’ So a guy is obsessed with a certain technology, feels he can be a pioneer to a brave new world and justifies it to himself in bad faith by thinking - " This technology that I’m trying to do is for all of us. Whether you’re a big corporation or somebody in their basement, you have access to this stuff – everybody does. People respond very positively to that." This, I believe is a dangerous belief - that tech can 'level the playing field' in a sense. It never does. Internet was supposed to be the great leveler. And for a while with Yahoo anonymous chat and early days of mushrooming internet cafes, it really did feel that way. But soon enough, the powerful people have turned it into a tool that is more advantageous to their interest at the expense of common people's. Governments use it for surveillance and propaganda. Companies use it to brainwash people into buying things they don't ne...

We, the people, are gullible idiots. C'mon, admit it. We have all been bullied into bad deals by powerful charlatans at some point or another. Governments are no different. The current one is getting away with our personal data and going about distributing our public resources and monies to its favourite cronies.This is no exceptional government. This happens all the time, in all the countries - to varying degrees. The varying part is important. I would much rather be in Norway where the leeway for such giveaways against the interest of public is small, compared to Angola and Nigeria where the oil bonanza instead has become oil curse. One of the important ways for moving towards Norway and away from Nigeria is for the public to become aware and educated about power. Education is a bad word now - what India creates in not educated people, it creates literate minions. By educated, i mean people who can reason, who can think critically, who can see the world from different perspect...

Reasonable people are a rare species. very rare. The world overwhelmingly is unreasonable, always has been. 20th century was a great experiment in trying to institutionalise reasonableness. But alas, we failed in that experiment. and what that messy utopia of rationality has spewed out is a 21st century that is dangerously globalised, unipolar and susceptible to selfishness of a few. If by chance, i meet someone who is, i feel like hugging him/her and somehow ensuring that the person remains a part of my life in some measure through conversations, ideas or projects together.

This is a Charles Bukowski poem called "All the way". Essentially, his thesis is that you must go 'all the way' whatever the cost may be. And I felt, what a fucking loser is this wierdo. I mean, I have read his 'Post office' and it is a kickass piece of literature. But what I realise now is that an incomplete and naive philosophy of self-absorbed nihilism possibly informed his work. Problem 1: All the way with what? We see a lot of this kind of inspirational bullshit being shared by people these days - exhorting people to do what they want to do. But the problem is no one these days knows what he/she wants to do. These videos and poems only add to consumerist angst whose only beneficiary is the capitalist power centers and not the social organism called human.(" Must do something, don't know what.. running with expensive shoes seems to be working for some as per commercials, let me try that." ) Purposeless souls are angstily drifting from...

JNU students are not stealing money from public banks. The powerful but immoral business men and their cronies in the nation's bureaucracy are. Beef eaters are not stealing your food; subsidizing for the politicians and driving farmers to kill themselves. The culprit are the flawed policies of the apathetic government shaped in no small measure by lobbying corporate and business-politician nexus. The 'Muslims'/ 'Hindus'/ 'Flying Spaghetti Monster worshippers' are not attacking your dignity as a human being. It is the capitalist power centers who would not let you organise and rise as equals. It perpetuates inequality and dreams of 'making it big', a lottery rigged from the start. The 'Anti-nationals' are only really anti-stupor . They are not endangering your survival. Your existence is being endangered by blind corporates and corrupt bureaucrats who subvert moral responsibilities , and who prioritise profit over human life. Jats/ Dali...

21st century humanity is the century of living in ' bad faith' . And if humanity survives through it, it will only do so by fighting its bad faith. So what exactly is this bad faith that I am talking about? I. What is 'Bad Faith'? Well, it quite simply is the web of lies we build around ourselves to avoid having to make hard choices. Bad faith is when you resist change or you refuse to accept the responsibility of responding to change or initiating change. It is a cocoon made of lies that keeps painful truth outside. It manifests every time we are forced to wade through an uncomfortable or even mildly critical question/ decision. It is a refusal to react/ act. It is a refusal to live consciously. So the next time someone points out your mistake and instead of acknowledging them or trying to understand why those mistakes were being pointed out, you fill your heart and mind with resentment and anger towards the messenger, you  are reacting in bad faith. You are cho...

The only truly successful meme of 21st century is that of 'Money'. Successful because no other idea has been accepted with such unanimity as the idea of money. A paper with little value becomes fantastically valuable with a photo of Mahatma Gandhi. (or a fish or watch tower if you are from Norway .) And this transformation happens because humanity has collectively agreed to bestow imaginary value upon real substance.  No other idea comes close to the level of acceptance that the idea of Money enjoys. More and more people identify themselves as atheists (so there goes religion). Not everyone believes in equality (the idea of caste refuses to die, The idea of class remains a reality. People are forever trying to find imaginary cues to set themselves favourably apart from the masses). The rise of ISIS and resurgence of Nazi sympathies tells us that idea of democracy and human rights are not as strong as we think they are. Money is the one ring to rule them all.  Idea...

I feel that the system is rewarding me well with my career.  Primarily because my career is in advertising industry and as it turn out, advertising is one of the most important soldiers in service of globalisation . So, while seemingly inconsequential, my role is an integral (though small) cog among the many million small cogs that keep this system running. The system needs people who are capable of doing what is required of them. And I am capable enough . Enough - The system only requires a very narrow skill set of mine. That is a small part of the arsenal of skill sets that a typical human requires to progress and thrive in life. I suck at breathing for example. I have terrible hand-eye co-ordination. I have hundred other deficiencies that I would much rather not share with my possible future employer. It astounds me that for all my short comings and a few strengths, I earn way too much in comparison to people who are better humans that me. I am lucky to have just the right...

 Today morning, I got a message from Citibank that a charge of Rs. 1400 was being made to my credit card. The funny thing is, I didn't authorise this. The funnier thing is, my account has been closed since at least half a year. So is the credit card separate from my account? If I don't have an account, how do I access customer service?  In the past, i had willingly let go of around 3000 rs to avoid hassle of having to interact with the robots who sit between me and humans in customer service department of that company. After a few days of frustration, I closed the account and let go of the money in the account. 'Fuck it' is what i said. I guess I will have to say it again. (the luxury of being able to say 'fuck it' is obviously bought by the system as well for me. I am very much a subject of the 'Capitol', not the districts.) This is how the 'system' operates. It's power is not in centralised and accessible individuals. It is in the mesh...

When people are talking about 'the system', what are they exactly talking about? When you fight against the system, who do you exactly fight against? Why are some people successful without much effort, while some languish? Who does the system reward, whom does it punish? Why do people kill each other? What causes people to think that a change is important? and what makes some ideas of changes possible, while some others simply die? When we talk about 'the system' what we really mean to say is - 'power structure'. We are curious about the flow of power. (From where to where? who/ what is the source? how to get some? what makes it flow?) If we believe Hollywood, the System is bunch of powerful humans who conspire in evil goals. (world domination, extreme wealth and so on.) But that can't be true. Humans want to believe that they are bigger than they are. That they have power and control over things that they don't. That they can comprehend the w...

www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2014/05/26/far-right-europe-election_n_5391873.html?1401104084 The Hindutva party in here and nazi anti-immigrants in Europe. Right wing parties everywhere. no one wants 'the others' on their soil. but that doesn't stop them from looting from 'the others' (colonisation & coupes & sponsored revolutions) and sending drones to kill 'the others'. where will the others go, if you contribute to their misery and downward spiral?  If the last century was about opening the world with fast rails, concordes & the internet. This century would be about making sense of this uncontrollable openness and ensuing vulnerability that individuals & groups perceive. If the last century was about the individual removed from his immediate world, this century would be about a new social consciousness of & want of belonging. The openness of last century does not really benefit the individuals and small groups as much as it does to ...

The security guards at the entrance of your typical mall is the new brahmin. Both flay around their hands in ritualistic nuisances. The older ritual-peddler would throw in flowers and water creatively, the new one runs a beep-beep metal detector in the air around us. Both are pretenses to comfort the incessantly worrying minds. Our  minds often wander in search of answers to questions that have no answers. and we just can't fathom the fact that some questions are plain wrong - that chasing them would never give you answers, only anxieties. As our world gets more and more critically complex, we would see emergence of newer and newer rituals: Unique identity cards, police with guns (even if they might not know how to operate them), walls, courts, child locks, the education system based on silly exams, audit firms, research firms and most of all advertising. Even if a rational mind realises all these institutions & acts as pretenses, one can't stop seeking consolation ...

Saw this promotional video for Bosch's automated driving system. There are similar efforts being attempted by other corporates too, notably Google. But here again, I feel corporates are trying to answer the wrong question .  'In the future' - we shouldn't need to travel unless we desire to travel (that is to say, travel only for leisure and not because you must to earn your bread). Our scientific endeavors need to be geared to completely remove commutes from our lives. In which case, driving would become an activity largely undertaken for leisure. But the fact remains, the way our economy is geared, people must leave there homes and travel greater and greater distances to bigger and bigger cities to earn. In China alone, 120 million youngsters leave their homes to find jobs in a year. Why is globalization only aiding economy and not human will? (Jobs migrating to cheaper and cheaper venues, forcing people to migrate towards jobs. As against, people moving to ...

http://player.vimeo.com/video/89305413 Ideas are tremendously potent. People turn mad in rage and kill. People smile beatifically and help others. People dig up, blow up, fill up, swamp the earth.  People chase imaginary ghosts & Questions & purposes. All their lives. People fetish on foods, movies, shoes, bodies and turn off the inner eye. People lose their sense of reality, their sense of justice, their balance of life. The breath. the breath is lost. The realisation of the breath becomes alien. A moment in silence turns into an eternity of restlessness. "Occupy me" screams the inner child fed on ideas 24x7. The hell that is introspection. the hell that is looking back into our acts in reality.  "Ideas. occupy me." The ants carry stuff for their colonies. What are we carrying, for whom? Our queen bee is Change with a capital C. Change, Change, Change. faster and faster. evolutions, revolutions. No matter at what cost. People chase c...

Absolute identity The world wants you to know for sure, what you want to be. Ads, movies, inspiring talking heads.. all want you to 'find yourself'. You believe in absolute identity. The belief that there is one possible ideal future for you and it is your primary duty to 'find' that future. The concept of 'finding' is quite alluring. It is not as heavy as the concept of doing or making. It is rife with possibilities. It doesn't kill possibilities. It celebrates the 'potential'. And 'potential' talks to you about the awesome you that no one knows about, but you surely do. 'Potential' stalls your actions, for who do you really need to prove, if not yourself? And in that sedentary search, you end up doing nothing. So scared of walking in any other direction than 'the one for you', that you would rather 'wait'. Fluid Identity Your future is uncertain. Future always is. What if you stop trying to fight tha...

Why invent Google glasses? Here's Sergey Brin trying to answer that question. Doesn't his argument seem a little unconvincing - a weak reason to deploy the best of the brains on the planet and 3 years worth of efforts.   The primary pivot of his argument is the glass' ability to improve social posture (?). He talks about how when interacting with your cell phone, you look down, away from the rest of the world. How when nervous, one fiddles with cell phone to escape the real world. So how is Glass a solution? It is an even more 'evolved' tool to keep the outside world 'out'! Ok, so Glass frees your hands. for what? for better documentation of our narcissism? These series of innovations (social media, smart phones, glass) are answering the most base yearnings of our narcissistic behavior. When you look down, atleast there's that bit of honesty - 'yes, I am looking away from you. Sorry for my awkward inability to be social.' With Gla...

Have you ever 'helped' anyone? any thing - small, big/ inconsequential, saved the world? By help I mean, of being useful for someone other than self and when some effort/ money/ time would be required to be spent. Truthfully speaking, I haven't much. Upon that realisation, I quickly rationalized that perhaps its an 'ability' - An ability to help. Which is to say, that some people are better at it than others. Perhaps, its just me trying to distance myself from the responsibility or perhaps I have hit upon something here. Anyways, here's the thought process. If the tendency to 'help' is an 'ability' that is intrinsic to individuals, what factors would influence it? (I won't get into the 'born with it'/ learned sort of debate. Sure it can be acquired. Yes we can. :) ) I thought of a few. They could be, 1. Empathy 2. Inner lightness/ inertia 3. Habit of rationalizing 4. Following the norm 1. Empathy I think I am am right whe...

Holiness What does it mean to be holy? Is it supreme happiness? Is it an ability to help others? Is it clairvoyance? Is it wisdom? Is it purity & unity of thought and action? Is it an ability to influence? What is holiness? At Kee monastery, we met these wonderful monks. Most of them have spent their entire lives here. The one with halo hails from Kibber. He has been a monk here since he was a kid. He had such an infectious and ready smile, it was hard not to smile along. He was curious about us. His curiosity was ego less. He was down to earth and unassuming.  The first time I saw the halo in the picture, I thought it couldn't be. Perhaps, its just a lens flair. Or is my doubt, stemming from my ego - that holiness must have accompanying grandeur. Flair or no flair, there is certainly something for me to learn here. Perhaps holiness exists in the rank of men and women - people like us. Its in their acceptance of themselves, that they find their holines...

30 its just a matter of a few years. and there I will be. under the glorious arches of 30-hood.  30 The number shines brightly in my head. Its a milestone that constantly barges into my vision, wherever i may be looking. i imagine it to be a small leprechaun like creature that's running around in 2 concentric circles. One around my head - the constant running threatens to add creases on my forehead. and the other around my waist, where the constant running is adding to the roundness of my person.  30  it constantly asks me to look back. 'Look back!' it screams. and then it tries to hold steady my gaze back into my past. Its a direction I have not frequently lingered on. The opposite direction was much more alluring in the past, and now I live content being in the present. But 30 makes me want to take stock of what i was set out for, and what grounds I have covered. I have never been good with appraisal, and this one will be the toughest. (I am happy with my l...